HI! Do you remember me? It's me...Katie. When I was really, really sweet, you would sometimes call me K.K. When I was especially smart and talented, some people called me Katie Couric. You will testify on my behalf, right? Will you please tell everyone that I used to be sweet. Back when I was a little, bitty Kitty, I was sweet...right?
I remember when you and I first met. Back in 1996, Theia had graduated from Auburn and had decided to spend the summer there working before starting grad school in the fall. I came to live with you and Theia in your apartment there...Genelda Place, remember?
Genelda Place. Now, that brings back some memories. Remember our cute neighbor Andy and his girlfriend Lara? We never could figure out how those two got together, could we? Remember when Craig and Eric brought you some magazines? And the mouse. That stupid mouse was in the fluorescent light fixture that night....you called Eric and Craig. Eric screamed like a girl. Oh good grief!
But then you moved away to finish your clinicals for pharmacy school.
Theia and I moved to a trailer at Dawson Park way down off of Wire Road. At first, it was just great. I used to help Theia study. She would spread her books and notebooks out on the floor so that I could lay on top of them for her. She used to really love when I would do that for her.
You finally came back to live with us. Oh, I had missed you sooooooooo bad when you were away. Remember that game you and I used to play? I would hide under you bed, and when you walked by, I would jump out and grab your feet. You would scream and I would dart out of the room like a bullet! Oh! Those were the good ole days, huh?
Oh, Dawson Park...yes, I think that's where my troubles all started. Remember our weird neighbor? The parole officer? He wasn't too weird, I don't suppose. But all those white cats he had. They were all over the place! How many were there...5...6...9? I can't remember! But they were HUGE. And some of them had had skin cancer (bless their hearts) and had their ears clipped off. Those cats gave me anxiety, and generally put me in a bad mood.
Another thing that put me in a bad mood...when Theia refused to sing my favorite songs to me. I used to love to crawl up in her arms and meow, meow, meow. I loved when she would sing that "A-B-C-D-E-F-G" song and the "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine..." But then she would cut loose in a song about Jesus loving me...for some reason that song hurt my ears. I would slap my Mommy and tell her to stop it. Everytime, she just told me I needed to get saved. That just put me in a really, really bad mood.
I've been in a bad mood ever since.
Theia finally graduated and we moved home to Sand Mountain.
Grandmother and Pepaw hated cats. They hated me, too. I don't know why, really. Beats the heck-far out of me. I don't know what their problem was. I mean, I'm nice. I'm pretty. I'm fluffy and gray. I told them they could still live in the house as long as they understood who was the boss. They just could not understand that I was the Queen.
One day, Pepaw tried to make me get out of the house. I said you crazy, man! He really was crazy...he got this big broom-thing and started swatting at me. I said to him keep hitting at me, and you'll be sorry! He kept on swatting at me. Stop it, man! I'm not kidding! Pepaw kept on being crazy with that broom! That's it man! You have crossed the line! I'm outta here! Now what you gonna do without me?
Uncle Jack had been begging and pleading for me to come take charge of his farm. He had all these dogs and goats and fish and ducks. You should see that farm now...I've really got it all whipped into shape! I don't know what Uncle Jack ever did without me.
I'm still in a bad mood, though. But I just can't help it. People insist on walking by me when I haven't summoned them to my presence. Haven't they any manners? Don't they know they should not speak unless I have spoken to them?
And get this...sometimes they call me "The devil-cat".... whatever! I'd just like to know where they got their information!
Anyway, if you are ever in South DeKalb county, come see me. Consider yourself officially summoned!
Your Old Friend,
P.S. I hope you like the pictures I am sending to you. I might be 13 years old, but I still got it goin' on girl!